Outsider
by blatantescapist
Summary: You find yourself in a deep mess. Do you fix it or do you wing it? (reincarnation fic)
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER****:** I do not own TG. If I did, it would be a story about happy and safe Kaneki.

**WARNING****: **MANGA SPOILERS!

**A/N****:** Sort of inspired by the self-insert fic, 'Rare Child レアチャイルド' by orochigay! Please read that fic first, thanks! Anyway, I just wanna know where I can take this story. I decided to try an experimental style rather than my usual slow-flowing timeline.

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><p><strong>I. <strong>

Most people are never meant to recall who they were in their previous life. To those who _do_ remember, they know better than to speak about it. They use their time to make the most out of their lives because they understand the meaning of death more than anyone else.

Being reborn was like waking up from a dream. Everything would be hazy at most. Snippets of your life in a soft blur, memories of a life you've once had would gradually creep into your infantile mind. For me, it was only until I've reached middle school did I finally piece the puzzle.

_Oh,_ I thought to myself one morning, _I'm alive._

Back then I didn't understand what was going on in my head. Sometimes I'd babble in nonsense English which my (new) parents thought I picked up from their old '_The_ _Beatles'_ records. I'd talk about weird things when I was a kid such as asking for a computer to log into 'social networks' or other things they've never even heard of.

So when I woke up one morning with full memory of who I was back then _(Twenty-two, got caught in a bus accident, bedridden in hospital for weeks, died too young)_, it had been one hell of a shocker. It was the first day of middle school and a huge information dump crashed in my brain like a bucket of ice-cold water.

"_Nagi! Hurry up! You're gonna be late!" _Ah, that's right. Japanese language.

I was in Nagasaki, Japan.

To be more precise, I was in Fukue Island at the west coast of Kyushu.

"_I-I'll be down in a sec, ma!"_ I cried out, pulling on my skirt. I _really_ wanted to spend the rest of the day trying to sort out my thoughts because people just don't remember their past lives out of the blue. It was unheard of!

I took a quick scan of my new, yet familiar room. It was small with a single bed, a bookshelf, and a wooden chair. There was a study desk on my right with faded animal stickers on its surface. On top were my old elementary school books inside a cardboard box. Attached on the wall was a newly installed corkboard. On its surface were crayoned drawings; one was of my new family, and the other was an artwork of me.

... As in me, the twenty-two year old 'me' who was awful at sports but good at baking and collecting second handed books. I was holding hands with a little girl who I suspect was the 'me' now.

I felt a sharp stab in my gut. I know deep down, when I dive into my memories—this little girl is inside my mind. She's me and I'm her… but she'll never be the same again. The thought of it made my heart ache.

"_Nagi!"_

_They're still my parents, _I reminded myself distantly.

I grabbed my bag that was sitting on my chair and pushed my sliding doors to the side. I buttoned up my uniform top as I ran downstairs. I spent the rest of the day jogging my memory and trying to act like a kid when I really wasn't. Getting to school was more of muscle memory than anything since I had to walk there. Remembering everything felt as if my cloudy life looked clearer, like wearing a new pair of glasses.

It was almost too surreal. I was now a middle school girl named 'Kobayashi Nagisa' living in the countryside complete with their dialect and lifestyle. I was _far_ from the wards of Tokyo.

Yes, as in _Tokyo Ghoul. _

Ghouls exist in this world.

It wasn't that hard to notice when all you hear from the news during dinner were about the attacks in X ward and a ghoul bust in Y ward. My school had been going on about it too, particularly my classmates. There were posters slapped on the school's bulletin board regarding tips and information to join the CCG Academy.

Living outside the wards of Tokyo didn't mean we were vulnerable to ghoul attacks. There were special doves relocated in different prefectures but not as much as they have in the cities. At most, we have around three here and I'm pretty sure they barely get to use their fancy quinques.

Of course, that didn't mean we have no ghouls around. There have been cases around cities with denser populations but I've hardly heard or seen any action in the village I lived in. I suppose I could count that as a blessing. The place I lived in was small and practically everybody knew each other.

The last attack in this area was seventeen years ago and that was by the edge of the village on the way to the city. There were barely any pieces left of the poor girl. The village did a proper burial and traditional blessing after that. I'd see a few elders leave flowers by the place of the incident every now and then.

I doubt any city-dweller ghouls would ever come here unless they miraculously found a way to get past the CCG security in the airports. That was another thing. Security was tight. Unless you had internal connections that could hook you up, you'd have to take the long route. Leaving the wards of Tokyo was strict but getting into Tokyo was a lot worse—registrations, health tests, paperwork proving you're 100% human through general hospital RC cell readings, etc.

Ah well. I doubt I'd ever meet Kaneki Ken and his merry band of flesh-eating friends anyway. We're literally islands apart and I wasn't exactly eager to fly myself to Tokyo and enroll myself into CCG Academy. I'm not an orphan and my parents don't have enough money to fund my entire trip. It would be too expensive.

Besides, I'd rather stay away from the trouble than jumping in it.

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><p>"Would you like some beverage?" asked the smiling flight stewardess.<p>

She was firmly holding onto the handle of her trolley with one hand, and an empty plastic cup on the other. My throat felt parched from nervously chowing down the packet of peanuts they offered a few minutes back. I needed a lot more than peanuts to get rid of my growing anxiety but I didn't have the guts to ask for hard liquor.

"Just a lemon-lime soda, thanks…" I meekly replied, "A-Also, can I get a peanut refill?"

Tokyo was literally an hour away.

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><p>You might be wondering how I could have gotten to Tokyo if I didn't have any eagerness or money.<p>

It's simple. At the end of high school, students were given the option to take entrance exams in the island instead of flying all the way to Tokyo. My parents had ushered me into trying my chances to see if I can get into any university. I was already set on taking college in Nagasaki so I thought it wouldn't hurt to try— which turned out to be a big mistake.

I didn't get into the big leagues like Tokyo-U or Haruna Gakuin but I got accepted in Kamii University with full-scholarship. I wasn't exactly an Einstein but my grades have been very good. I didn't find any point in hiding my 'intelligence' at the remote countryside so I went all out. Apparently, my dad mailed my grades along with my high school recommendation letters to the university after mom's urging.

I had to pick whether to take the scholarship or stay in Nagasaki and pay full tuition fees.

Of course I had to take the cheaper cut.

I knew how hard it was to pay student loans back in my first life so I did my best not to burden my parents. Life looked a lot more different when you've already experienced it the first time.

However, that didn't mean I went down without a fight. I threw _all_ my ammo—_the rent in Tokyo's gonna be expensive! What about the transportation fees an' food? What do I do if I get attacked by ghouls?!_ And my personal favorite: _'Would ya really send yer only daughter all alone in the big city?!'_

Needless to say, I got lectured for raising my voice.

"You'll be stayin' in the student dorms," mom replied, wiping her hands on her apron. "Just study and do good!"

"C'mon now! Kamii's in the 20th ward—it's real safe!" dad laughed heartily,

_Yeah, sure. 'Safe'._

I've been holding onto the things I've seen in Tokyo Ghoul but my memory of it wasn't as sharp as it was back when I had been in middle school. I had grieved over the loss of my first life for a few months when I was alone in my room. Outside, I kept the façade of a happy child. It took nearly two years until I've grown accustomed to living here. In the end, the island and its occupants had wormed its way in my heart.

As for Tokyo Ghoul, I remembered most of the important parts but nothing in-between. I didn't know the time gaps. I didn't know when an event would happen or if I had already missed it. I'd recall names and faces but I'm pretty sure I've forgotten a bunch of CCG investigators and members of ghoul organizations.

_Ugh, no. Just focus on your course,_ I scolded myself. It sounded as if I was going to do something drastic.

It wasn't like I didn't want to help out. I don't think I can count how many times I've lied down on my bed thinking about the things I could do to prevent this tragedy from happening. First of all—I didn't even know where Anteiku was. It wasn't as if the manga showed the address and directions to the café!

And I was human.

_Human._

Touka would skewer me if I even hinted of having knowledge of ghouls, let alone their organization. _Yeah, you can help by being my dinner tonight, Nagi-chan._ Yeah, no. I've already died once. I'd rather not die again.

And so the decision was made and I was going to Tokyo. I would have gotten into good detail on how my last days went but this isn't a story about my peaceful life on the island with all those tearful goodbyes and promises of long-lasting friendships. This is a story about my life in Tokyo and how I met Kaneki.

Talk about country bumpkin meeting city boy. Hah, classic.

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><p>I didn't meet Kaneki immediately after I arrived in Tokyo. In fact, he was far from my mind when I stepped foot in Haneda airport. The first thing I thought of was how incredibly small I felt compared to the huge city. The last time I've been to one was in my first life and that had been <em>ages<em> ago. I've been so used to walking through the countryside village, fishing during Sundays, and visiting our neighbor city when I had the time. It was weird seeing 'foreigners' again, strolling past me with their luggage and souvenirs.

"_This is the pre-boarding announcement for flight JAL37 to Osaka. We are now inviting those passengers with small children and passengers requiring special assistance, to begin boarding at this time. Please have your boarding pass and identification ready."_

I nervously walked past the terminal gates to find the baggage claim. On the walls were scrolling texts of flight departures, announcements, and _CCG reminders_. It hadn't exactly hit me until now that this was all real. Flesh-eating ghouls were real. Those CCG daily reminders were things to_ actually take caution on._

Back when I've been watching the news at home, I never actually felt anything other than the fact that they were creatures that existed, just like wars existed outside of Japan. You knew it was there but you never thought it would affect you. And now I was here in _Tokyo_ on my way to the _20th_ _Ward_.

The binge-eater, the ghoul restaurant, the attacks in the alleyways, the tortures and blood and tragedy—_ Whoa there! Hold that thought, Nagi! We're__ not going to think about that...! _I didn't come here to Tokyo to dive straight into that mess. I came to study in Kamii University, not run around to aid the ghouls or take part in CCG. Besides, most of my time would be being preoccupied with attending lectures in the campus, and heading straight back to the student dorms.

By the time I arrived down the escalator, I spotted my bags on the conveyer belt and placed them on my trolley. It was nearly twelve noon so it was probably best to take a breather and have some lunch. I figured I should take a look around after having my documents checked. Although there weren't that many shops around the domestic terminal, there was enough to keep businessmen and tourists happy.

There was a bookstore two shops away from a sandwich restaurant. I took a pause to stare at it disbelievingly, unsure whether to grimace or gape in shock. On the window's display were copies of Takatsuki Sen's _The Black Goat's Egg_. I haven't read any of her books since our local bookstore never had it stocked.

"I guess it's pretty popular here," I muttered, hands twitching._ No, no, I shouldn't buy one. I need to eat..._

I glanced at the sandwich restaurant and the information booth near the pamphlet stands. I needed to save up if I want to take a cab straight to the university. It was a lot more expensive but it would be the quickest route.

I sighed.

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><p>And so I bought one copy out of morbid curiosity. It was popular to the ghouls in this world, and a fiction within a 'fictitious' world was tempting to read- <em>Oh who am I kidding? I wasted my money!<em>

On my way to the 20th ward, I decided to take the bus and buy some microwavable bento at a convenience store. From there I had to get to Shibuya and take the train all the way to Nerima. The cab fare to Kamii was a staggering thirteen thousand yen, which was equivalent to a week's worth of my food (I'd rather not starve, thanks).

Luckily, the school was located near the train station. By the time I got to the campus, I was taking my sweet time trying to catch my breath. It was a miracle no ghouls tried to jump on me— granted, the way to the campus had been a bit crowded and no sane ghoul would try to attack someone in broad daylight… I think.

"Bad thoughts, bad thoughts…!" I quickly straightened myself and dragged my luggage towards the campus dorms. Mom had printed out a copy of the university's map— I dug into my pockets and unfolded a crumpled paper. Apparently I'll have to share a room with a schoolmate.

After walking in circles for the past ten minutes, I decided to ask for directions. Thankfully there was a woman sitting by the fountain who didn't seem too busy.

"Excuse me, miss," I said,

She blinked and looked up from her mobile phone, "Yes?"

"Can you direct me to the campus dorms? I'm sorta new here," I rubbed my arm, feeling a little self-conscious of my accent. It was obvious I wasn't from Tokyo.

"Oh um," she pointed to her left, "The campus dorms are that way. Which building are you assigned to?"

"_Ak-Aki_…?" I quickly looked at my paper, " The Autumn building..."

"Then it's next to the Winter building," she said, fiddling with her bangles, "Just follow the sign when you get there."

"Okay," I smiled in relief before bowing shortly, "Thanks, miss."

I didn't know it back then but I had just asked directions from Nishiki's girlfriend, Kimi. It was different seeing them in inked pages and in flesh. I couldn't immediately recognize them as I thought I would. In the back of my mind, I wondered if this would pose as a problem later on.

I got to my dormitory safe and sound. My roommate, Yamada Kei was a major in Biology science, specifically molecular and cell biology. She was polite if a little on the odd side. Kei had a big collection of books dedicated to ghouls. It was clear why she chose her course.

"So, uh, you like ghouls?" I hesitantly asked, hoping that she wasn't a ghoul herself.

"Not really," she murmured nonchalantly, "I'm more interested in RC cells."

Kei was a year above me so she knew her way around the campus. Unfortunately, she was a science major and I was part of the literature department so she couldn't help me with my schedule. (I decided to take English language and literature since I was familiar with both.)

I'm embarrassed to admit that I was dreadfully paranoid and cautious during my first month in Tokyo. I only left the campus twice to buy something at the nearest district mall. I kept looking around for 'familiar faces' like Nishiki, Hide, or even Kaneki but I couldn't find any of them.

So I decided to just focus on my studies. It was what I came for after all. I phoned my parents regularly about my progress at school as well as my old high school friends. Most of them decided to work early while others took college in Nagasaki.

Eventually I stopped worrying and let the days pass by with ease. I made sure to update myself with news regarding the CCG right before my morning classes. I buried myself with lecture notes, research papers, and instant coffee. It felt weird being a college student again but the soft tug of nostalgia was not unwelcomed.

I made more friends with Kei's biology major buddies than my own. With all the books our professors have thrown at us, it was a little hard to juggle quality time with people in the same class as you. It didn't help much when we all had to compete for the title of 'who's borrowing that book in the library first'. It was that or we had to buy in the bookshop.

I've seen Hide once in the span of my first semester in Kamii. We weren't in the same class and we've never formally met but it was the closest encounter I've had with a 'character' (excluding Kimi). It was around the middle of June. Hide was speaking over his phone right by the corridor. My English class had just finished and we were lucky to be let out early.

" … I'm telling you, man! That show last night was great!" He nodded fervently before laughing, "Yeah well, you just don't understand the appeal of Katase's ace detective skills!"

"Oi, Hide!" a guy called from inside the lecture hall I've just exited, "Let's go!"

"Yeah, sure!" Hide said, covering his phone before bringing it back to his ear, "Kaneki, gotta go! The last class just finished early since we're using their lecture hall for our group presentation." A snicker, "Yeah, yeah! I've got it all under control!"

It was brief and I was barely given the time to look at his face properly but it was definitely him. My memories were foggy at most but those headphones and bright hair were easy to distinguish.

I went into a blank daze after that. After plunging in deep into my lecture notes and tests, it was so easy to forget about _Tokyo Ghoul_. Just hearing its title felt so silly now.

For the first time since I've arrived in the 20th ward, I decided to open Takatsuki's book that night. I finished the entire thing without sleeping. The _Black Goat's Egg _is a gripping tale about a son and his mother who happens to be a serial killer. Slowly, the son's mentality begins to deteriorate as he realizes that he himself begins to have the same impulses as her.

As a literature major, it was hard not to notice Takatsuki's style of writing. Her story pales in comparison to other books I've read. It was clear that she was young for her age, if not talented. However, it was easy to see why it was so popular. Something about her book felt absolutely believable. The elusiveness of her writing only made it more suspicious, as if she was used to secrets and lies. Her work was mostly appreciated for her talent in vividly painting the brutality of her broken characters.

But as a human being, I found her work terrifying.

_This is the kind of world you're living in right now,_ I reminded myself.

I stared down at the white cover of my book and found myself thinking how it should have been red.

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><p><em>.<em>


	2. Chapter 2

**_DISCLAIMER_****_:_** I do not own TG. If I did, it would be a gag manga about Chie and Tsukiyama.

**_WARNING_****_: _**_MANGA SPOILERS!_

**_A/N:_** Sorry for the wait. I'm only making this story for fun. I actually have other stories in another account, lol.;; Anyway, Café Rio exists in the anime if you check the scene where Rize is walking down the street. 5000+ words!

_AnimeFreak-_ I'm pretty sure _'The Black Goat's Egg'_ and _'The Egg of the Black Goat'_ are the same. I know you're being technical with the Japanese translation-「黒山羊の卵」/ _kuroyamahitsuji no tamago_ but I think we could all agree that the egg belongs to the black goat regardless of the arrangement. Grammar, you will always be a nightmare to me. OTL

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><p><strong>II. <strong>

The first time I _saw_ Kaneki was during my second semester in Kamii University.

We only had one class together and it was translations theory; a class containing literature, semantics, and discussions about works that may be lost in translation. I found the class interesting but it was difficult to focus when half of my attention was on the meek boy sitting five rows away from me.

Our professor, Mr. Namikawa had gone through his attendance sheet just to verify the names of the late enrollees. They were common during the start of semesters._ "Ide Yuuichi, Kagawa Michi, Kaneki Ken…"_

I nearly choked on my coffee that morning.

It was difficult to recognize him without his eye patch. Without it, his face was pretty easy to forget. Kaneki didn't have any distinctive features nor did he have any remarkable traits that made him stand out in class. He was the type of person you'd remember vaguely years later but can't quite pinpoint his name.

Still, attending the same class as Kaneki Ken felt too surreal to be true. I spent an entire week double-checking his existence instead of paying attention in class. Kaneki Ken never failed to arrive minutes before a lecture and leaf through a book under his desk. If it weren't for his shiny plot armor saving his ass, he would've been caught slacking off.

I didn't get to talk to him though. It wasn't because I didn't want to or anything; our translations theory class required a seatwork analysis every meeting and talking was not recommended. Those who had to retake the class knew better than to piss Namikawa-sensei off, and those who did talk learned why.

As for the first time I _talked_ to Kaneki... let's just say it was completely different from what I imagined. Which was saying something because I've dedicated a lot of nights running endless scenarios in my head during my first few weeks in Kamii University. Sometimes I imagined our first meeting to be something ordinary like bumping into him in the school's bookstore. Other times, it would spiral into something scary like accidentally stumbling upon white-haired Kaneki wolfing down a ghoul in a secluded alleyway. Those nights I tossed and turned in my bed drenched in cold sweat.

But before Kaneki was _Anteiku_ and that had an entire story all on its own.

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><p>As a scholarship student I was preoccupied with my studies. Whenever I needed to do a paper due the following day, I'd go to the cafeteria and whip myself some instant coffee. It tasted awful but it was cheap and it did the job.<p>

One day, I had to write a two-page analysis on some short story. I didn't have enough time last night to finish it so I decided to bring my laptop with me to finish the last few paragraphs before my class started. I sat on one of those outdoor benches that were scattered around campus and typed away.

A few minutes later two talkative students decided to seat on the bench next to mine. They started talking about some professor from another department and then from there, they branched to the topic of homework and projects. I know I shouldn't have been listening in on their conversation but it was a little hard not to when they were being so loud.

At one point one of them began ranting about how they weren't catching enough sleep and they had to resort in downing tons of energy drinks and coffee. I couldn't help but feel for the girl right there since I could relate.

"The coffee in the cafeteria's shit too," she added, slouching on her seat.

"Speaking of coffee, there's this really nice café I recently found last weekend!"

"Oh? What's it called?"

"Café Rio, it's pretty small but the coffee's good." her friend replied, "It's right next to Hotaka-jii's barbershop and this other coffee shop named Anteiku. It's in the residential district and..."

My heart dropped.

_What the hell? _I swallowed dryly, unable to process anything else after that bomb drop.

What were the chances of overhearing the café's address? That one moment where I needed a good place to cram and I just so happen to catch the location of Anteiku? No. Stuff like that _doesn't happen_. I might have also made an incoherent noise but I hastily followed it with a cough. Thankfully, they didn't spare me a glance and continued chatting.

I didn't know how long I stared at my laptop screen but by the time I snapped out of it, I only had fifteen minutes left until my next class. I quickly typed up a half-assed conclusion, and ran off to print my paper. I couldn't concentrate in my classes after that.

I've been nothing but cautious when I first arrived in Tokyo. Anything to do with CCG stayed strictly on checking the news, and the only fair share of ghouls I got were from the books Kei owns in our room.

But this was_ Anteiku _we're talking about here. When you're given the opportunity to visit the famed café for ghouls, it was hard _not_ to go. Curiosity had always gotten the best of me, like when I bought that Takatsuki Sen novel impulsively or when I discreetly spied on Kaneki majority of the time in class_… yeah, I'm not very proud of those moments._

That was how I found myself in front of the steps of Anteiku later that day.

It was only half past two and the road was fairly deserted. There was an old woman watering the plants outside her home and a businessman riding his bicycle next to the sidewalk. Aside from the city noise, it was a quiet neighborhood. There were rows of trees at the opposite side of the street, its brittle leaves beginning to turn yellow.

_Is this really a ghoul zone? _I thought to myself as I stopped in front of the 'Anteiku' sign. I was half tempted to take a photo of it on my phone for a keepsake but that would probably look suspicious to a ghoul passerby. I gazed up at the flight of steps uneasily. It wasn't like they were going to maul me the second I enter the café but I couldn't help but feel both nervous and excited. The worst that could happen would be running into a hotshot ghoul like Tsukiyama or Rize.

_Yeah,_ I gulped, _let's just go and buy some coffee._ Hefting my book bag, I carefully climbed the narrow staircase.

A bell chimed softly above me as I pushed open the door. The scent of coffee wafted in the air the moment I entered the café. It was a quaint shop that had less than ten tables and even lesser customers. An old man _(Yoshimoto? Yoshikawa?)_ was tending the bar, pouring a cup of freshly brewed coffee to a customer sitting by the counter.

"Welcome," greeted the woman behind the counter.

She definitely wasn't Touka but she looked like she's been working here for quite some time now. I absentmindedly bowed in return, _must be one of the other employees then. Wait a minute, ghoul employees… oh shit, a ghoul! A real ghoul! _That was more or less my entire thought process when I stared at her.

She didn't look any different from a human. Her black hair was combed and pinned properly, and her outfit was crisp and clean. On her breast pocket was the nameplate 'Irimi Kaya'. It really was hard to tell whether someone was human or ghoul. I tried to picture her eyes turning into red pupils with black sclera but all I got were bleak images of a show I once watched a long time ago.

"Miss?" she called, raising an eyebrow.

_Oh crap._

"Uh," I gripped onto my bag as words stumbled out of my mouth, "Sorry, um, this my first time 'round here—Do I take my order here an' pay?" I pointed at the seat not far from the door, "Or do I sit… down?"

"If you'll take a seat, we'll be sure to have a waiter take your order, miss." She replied professionally,

"Okay, thank you," I replied, meekly bowing in apology.

I quickly sat down near the window and placed my book bag onto the chair next to me. _Ugh, _I pressed my palms on my cheeks in embarrassment and stayed motionless for an entire minute. _How suspicious can you get, Nagi?_

Not only that, I _gawked_ at her like she was some sort of freak show.

Up until this point, I didn't really have any firm opinion on ghouls. I've never met one—or at least, to my knowledge. In my eighteen years of my life in this world, I've only heard the side of the humans. In school, we were taught to hate ghouls. _They are the villains of our human community. They eat our flesh and create chaos everywhere._ Anyone caught aiding a ghoul were sentenced to jail; no hearings, just cold hard fact.

And then there's the story I've read in my past life that showed what life was for a ghoul. Poverty, constant hiding, cannibalism, turf wars, secret organizations, illiteracy for the unprivileged, experimentation, and a lot more. The media kept portraying ghouls as monsters but in truth, they were very human.

_Arghh, this is making me feel worse…_ I slumped on my seat, suddenly feeling guilty.

I slid my elbows off the table after cooling off and dared to look around the café again. To my amazement no one in the room glanced at my direction, least of all the old man behind the bar. Wasn't he the head honcho of their organization or something? Other than the television playing the news, everyone was content chatting privately with one another.

As time ticked by slowly, I was beginning to discover that no one particularly cared about my arrival _or_ my earlier blunder in front of the cashier girl. _Crap, I think I overreacted._ I squeezed my eyes shut as I fiddled with the straps of my bag. The heat on my face was starting to prickle my cheeks.

"May I take your order?"

I nearly jumped out of my seat as I whipped my head towards the waiter standing by my right. He was fairly plump and had a bright smile on his face. Clumps of his chestnut brown hair were pulled back neatly with slick gel. On his breast pocket was the nametag, 'Enji Koma'. He held a notepad pad and pen, looking ready to write away.

"Oh," I faltered, slurring back to my old twang. "A-Ain't there a menu I can borrow?"

"…There's one on your left." Enji replied, tipping his pen forward.

I shrunk in embarrassment and took the tiny card that was standing on the surface of the table. I flipped the card over and read through their menu. It didn't have that many choices; espresso, cappuccino, café au lait, caffé mocha, iced coffee, green tea, bottled water. What caught my eye was a short list of food underneath the drinks menu. It wasn't much, merely a variation of toasted sandwiches. My stomach grumbled right on time.

"Then can I have some cappuccino and a club sandwich…?"

"Okay then," he chirped, jotting down my order. "The sandwich might take a few minutes, is that alright?"

I nodded weakly, feeling exhausted all of a sudden. He smiled and moved over to the bar to hand over my order. I sat there and waited quietly in fear of embarrassing myself even further. First time in the famed Anteiku and I blubber like an idiot.

I got tired of staring at the tissue holder and decided to flip through my lecture notes. I usually scribble messily on the pages during class and rewrite them neatly when I got back to the dorm. It was easier to refresh lessons that way. Luckily, I didn't have to wait that long. It took around less than ten minutes for my order to arrive.

"Thank you for waiting," Enji announced, placing my order neatly on the table. "Your cappuccino and club sandwich." He set down a small tray with packets of sugar and milk. I sheepishly thanked him, pushing my notes away to make room. The moment he walked away, I grabbed the fork on the side and decided to dig in.

The sandwich tasted… mediocre. It wasn't exactly bad nor was it good but it filled my stomach. It was understandable since ghouls didn't have the right taste buds to test its flavor. I found it nice of them to add a small menu of snacks to go with their coffee. On the other hand, their coffee tasted _divine_. I wasn't an expert on coffee but it tasted a lot richer than the ones we had at our college cafeteria. I guess there really was a difference between freshly brewed and instant.

All in all, my trip to Anteiku had been unexpectedly normal. I left a tip on the way out, feeling very pleased with my visit. It must have been obvious because the cashier girl, Irimi had smiled back when I passed by.

It was only three thirty when I came back to the dorms. My good mood didn't vanish so I worked on the rest of my notes until my roommate returned from her afternoon classes. The moment I heard the door open, I greeted her like always.

Kei blinked, setting her bag down next to the bookshelf. "Did you have a good day?"

"Yeah," I nodded truthfully, tapping my pen lightly on the notebook. "Yeah, just had a surreal experience…"

And_ I did_. To be honest, I was expecting a few ghouls to turn their heads since I was human but they barely glanced at me at all. It was either they were used to having humans visit their shop every now and then or I didn't give them enough credit. In fact, I would've dismissed it as a normal neighborhood café if I didn't know it was run by ghouls.

When I thought back on it, the whole experience had been nothing but pleasant if it weren't for the nervousness that had clouded my mind. The coffee was good, the service was nice, the atmosphere was quiet and mellow—I even got my work done in half when I had been writing my notes in Anteiku.

At some point I decided it didn't hurt to go back as a treat to myself. I went to Anteiku on my Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays since on those days I had no afternoon lectures. I made sure to leave before four o'clock since I didn't want any run-ins with a ghoul at night. Aside from the whole ghoul thing, I thought it was a good deal.

Not only did Anteiku let me read my books while drinking a cup of coffee (the library didn't allow food or drinks and the students lounge was always noisy), there was a used bookshop not far from the café that had a portion of English books on sale. Whenever I came to the café, I managed to fill my book bag with quite an assortment of required classics, and a few Japanese light novels to get my mind away from the thicker readings.

Kirimi, Enji, and Yoshimura had deemed me a regular on my fifth visit. It wasn't as if I became friends with them (they were pretty tight-knit), but I had to sit down at the bar once since there was a group of high school kids who occupied the seats near the windows. The only option was the bar or next to the shady looking guy near the television.

Yoshimura was very good at starting light conversations. He started off by suggesting to leave my book bag on the stool next to me, then asked me about my enthusiasm for books. I had been nervous at first, slipping back into my old dialect whenever I stuttered an answer. I thought for a moment he was suspicious of me but he looked genuinely interested.

I told him I was Nagi and I majored in English language and literature. I explained that there was a good shop that sold English books near the neighborhood and the coffee in Anteiku was great. When he handed me my order, I thanked him and accidentally let the conversation fall flat.

After that awkward talk, both Enji and Kirimi decided to greet me using my name. They'd come by to my seat and ask about my coffee or my day but other than that I was left alone with my books. Anteiku had cured me a little bit of my over exaggerated imagination with each mundane visit.

In any case, I promised myself to stop dropping by once Kaneki starts his part-time work in the café. That way I'd know where I was in the timeline. I'd probably miss the coffee but I could live without it.

* * *

><p>"I have to what now?" I blinked, looking up from my copy of Virginia Woolf's <em>Mrs. Dalloway<em>. It was a Friday and I was loafing around on the foot of my bed. Kei sat on the chair opposite of me, pushing away her books that had detailed descriptions of RC Cell theories. I tried reading through it once and I couldn't understand a word of it.

"It's for my class," Kei explained, swiveling on her seat to face me. "I need to do some proper RC Cell reading on five people. You've gotten a reading before, haven't you?"

"Yeah," I nodded, "I had to take it to get to Tokyo."

I've gone through the process in our old hospital back in Fukue and had the papers printed for legal proof. Basically we had to give a blood sample and it would be processed through a reader that would estimate the total RC Cells we had in our bloodstream. Since we didn't have a storage compartment or _'kakuhou'_ like ghouls, I imagine one of the few ways to find our RC cell levels was through this method. I didn't know the full procedure of a proper reading but I assumed it was more than the general.

"Would you mind if I take a sample then?"

"Sure, I guess…" I replied as I set my book down. "When do you need it done?"

"We can stop by the laboratory tomorrow," She murmured, jotting my name down on her notepad. "I need it by next week. Do you have class in the morning?"

"Just English at eight o'clock," I grimaced. It was my _only_ class on Saturday and it was three hours long. "I'll meet you there after class. What building was it again?"

The next morning I followed Kei's directions to get to the Biology Department. It was located at the other side of the campus with the rest of the science branches such as Pharmacy and Medicine. It wasn't my first time around these grounds since I sometimes joined Kei and her friends to lunch. They were kind enough to let me in their circle despite our different majors.

When I got to the laboratory, Kei told me she was going to do a complete blood count to get a thorough review of my RC Cells. Her two other friends were there too along with some other students who I assumed was from her class. I sat down on one of the metal chairs and had my arm strapped in preparation for a venipuncture.

Although I didn't understand Kei's technical garble about the procedures of full blood counting, the most I understood from her was that Kamii University recently funded for automated counters, which greatly helped the new students. Apparently the old alumni batch donated some money to the school because they had a tough time doing manual blood count.

Kei promised to pass me the results when she was finished. In the mean time, she conducted tests on a few others. I lingered around for a few more hours and chatted with the other students before finally leaving for lunch. It was a Saturday so I was going to visit Anteiku again. They didn't have a lunch menu so I was probably going to eat somewhere else first.

"Um, I'll be taking my leave," I said, standing up to sling the strap of bag on my shoulders.

"Aw, where ya goin'?" Satomi asked. She was one of Kei's friends who had been weirdly fascinated with my island dialect. She decided to imitate it whenever she talked to me. I guess it was because Satomi never met people from the lower regions of Japan. Not that many folks from our place come to Tokyo. If we had business with the CCG, there was a branch in Kyoto.

"Lunch," I elaborated shortly,

"Kei, let's eat already!" Satomi cried out, slapping both her hands onto the lab table.

"Mm," Kei hummed noncommittally. She was swiftly arranging the blood samples that had been properly labeled with a masking tape. Kei looked over the monitors in deep concentration, thoroughly ignoring Satomi annoyed expression.

"Come on, we've been here for hours!" Satomi whined, pulling her friend's arm. I was torn between dashing out of the laboratory and waiting for them to finish. "You can check them back after we grab some grub! Just bring those cell biology books of yours to keep you preoccupied! Nagi, we're comin' with ya!"

"No, no, it's okay!" I raised my hands, not wanting to get in between Kei and her precious work. One of the reasons why I agreed to give her my blood sample was because I've been cluttering our room with all the cheap books I bought for my course. There were barely any places left for her ghoul books in the shelf so I had to transfer my things under the bed. That and Kei _hated_ a cluttered workspace. "I'm only going out for some coffee—I'm not that hungry actually…"

"S'fine! Better than stayin' here cooped up in the dark lookin' at the darn monitor," Satomi drawled, jabbing Kei on the ribs with her finger. The latter didn't budge at all. "Give me five minutes and I'll get her to leave, promise!"

* * *

><p>Saturday afternoon, meaning another routine visit to Anteiku. Or it should've been.<p>

Any other time I'd buy myself a cup of coffee while flipping through a book I needed to analyze for class. This time, however, two people were with me so that was definitely not an option. I suggested Café Rio since it was literally right next to Anteiku. I've never actually been there so I didn't know what to order though.

Fortunately, Satomi agreed to my suggestion and we went inside the café without any trouble. There was a complete contrast between Café Rio and Anteiku. For one thing, the menu was a lot bigger; it had an assortment of frappuccino drinks, teas, and pastries to go with your coffee. We ordered our food and drinks at the counter and sat by the window booth while we waited for our names to be called. I tapped my finger in rhythm with the pop song playing in the background.

"Push those books away, Kei! It's break time!" Satomi nagged, wagging her finger at her friend.

I was really glad we were in Café Rio. Kei brought her ghoul books with her and I didn't know what I'd do if anyone in Anteiku ever saw it. They probably wouldn't really think much of it but it's better to be safe than sorry.

By the time we had all our orders we decided to dig in. Caramel waffles weren't exactly what I had in mind for lunch but it was better than going to Anteiku. I tried suggesting fast food but Satomi didn't want to hear any of it. She could be as stubborn as a mule sometimes. We chatted for a while, asking each other about our courses and talking about how different college was from high school—or to be more precise, Satomi and I exchanged stories while Kei ate quietly.

At one point, Satomi started talking about the news and she dwelled on the Binge Eater subject. Rize has been all over the news lately. It first started as an unsuspecting list of disappearing men, and then later it was revealed to the public that the disappearances weren't a coincidence. It was the work of a ghoul that had previously been from the 11th Ward. Apparently, the Binge Eater moved to the 20th and declared it as its new hunting ground.

My parents phoned me on August, a week after the sudden hype of the Binge Eater. I told them I was safe in Kamii and managed to calm them down. I made sure to call them once a week after that.

"I can't believe it's so near," Satomi shivered dramatically, "I'm glad I'm not a guy…!"

"The binge eater's a careless ghoul," Kei murmured, finally breaking her silence. "The number of humans it eats is more than the required amount. It already attracted a lot of attention, probably both the CCG and its own kind. If the investigators managed to find it though, they'd have a hard time killing the ghoul. Excess energy will only give it more strength."

"Way to ruin my appetite, Kei…" Satomi grimaced, pushing her plate away. "Urgh, why does it have to be us?"

"RC cells are the nutrients a ghoul needs to keep on living," Kei explained, "Other than ghouls, we're the only ones that have these cells in our body. It's either they eat us or their own kind."

"So that's why ghouls can't eat animals?" I asked, a little fascinated with the impromptu lesson.

"Animals have little to no RC cells." Kei replied, stabbing her cake with a fork. "Ghouls eat humans raw because they obtain more energy that way. Cooking will only destroy a big portion of the desired nutrients. Their stomachs are stronger than ours so they don't risk their health."

"Can we _not_ talk about people as food…?" Satomi cut in, looking very sick at the thought. I sheepishly apologized while Kei didn't look fazed at all. Either way, the subject was dropped and we moved onto a lighter conversation.

It was nearly half past one when we finished our lunch. Kei and Satomi had class at two so they had to leave soon. We pulled out some loose change to give as a tip. Café Rio was a little dark inside so when we stepped out of the café, I had to shield my eyes from the afternoon light. Satomi stretched her arms before sighing contently, "Okay, let's get back to class!"

"You guys go ahead," I said, thinking about my usual Saturday routine. "I have to go the bookstore." Kei narrowed her eyes on me at the thought of more books in our dorm room. I flinched a little and retracted my words, "J-Just to look around, that's all…"

Satomi sighed, "You and your books… Fine, fine, Kei c'mon! We gotta go!"

I was a little full but I felt like visiting Anteiku just to get back to today's schedule before going back to the dorm. I waved them a goodbye and faltered the moment they turned their backs. I stood immobile, watching _Kaneki Ken_ pass by my friends and continuing up to the steps of the Anteiku building. _Why is it so hard to get over the fact that he's real?_

This was the first time I caught Kaneki in Anteiku. Aside from our translations theory, we never had the same timetable. I couldn't help but think, _Again? Nah, it's only a coincidence._ I suppose it would be a little weird to never bump into each other in the café.

…

Unable to contain myself, I waited for a minute before going up the stairs of Anteiku. It was only simple curiosity. I had no intention of getting involved. I had no intention doing anything further than watch from afar.

But that's how it usually went, didn't it?

If you were born in a world you knew knowledge of then wouldn't it be simple? So simple to think- _maybe there is a reason why I'm in Tokyo._ Maybe there is a reason why I was reincarnated. Maybe these circumstances aren't coincidences._ Maybe I was born to make things right._ Let me tell you right now how dangerous this kind of thinking is.

It's easy to fall prey to such egocentric thinking- even me.

* * *

><p><strong>Next chapter:<strong> A full, legit appearance from Kaneki and Touka! I was going to put it on this chapter but it's already 5000 words long, lol.;; _This is fresh from Word Document so please excuse the typos and the grammar. Constructive criticism and corrections are appreciated! _Also, Satomi and Kei are minor/extra characters. They won't appear often.

And no, Nagi won't be fighting with ghouls, or working as a waiter in Anteiku / investigator in CCG.


End file.
